If you grew up without a father -- could this trigger a suicidal tendency in later yrs?

You have issues. The healthy thing to do would be to work them out with a therapist. Childhood does affect adulthood, but pointing a finger at one single thing is hyperfocusing. There is more to what brought you to this point in life. It's possible that your dad leaving plays a big role. It's also possible that you are depressed and seeking an explanation when the reality is that you inherited the real illness depression. Idk. Ydk. A therapist can help you figure all of this out.